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Friday, August 3, 2012

5 pound surprise.

I got an amazing little surprise yesterday. I jumped on the Wii Fit to play some games for the kids, and did my little weight assessment thing. I got weighed and measured July 20th, and as of yesterday, I had gone down another 5.5 lbs. I haven't measured myself in a few days, so I don't know if I'm losing inches.
Anyways, I started feeling really fat a few days ago so I figured I had gained a little weight or something. To my surprise I didn't! I was really scared that the hormone therapy I'm taking was going to cause me to gain weight. They haven't yet.

I went to my "Female Dr." a month or so ago, and had an exam done because I've been in some excruciating pain. Like, bent over in tears not being able to move kinda pain. I have no insurance, so she wouldn't do anything more than really talk to me. She had 4 months of free samples of Lo Loestrin Fe and some other hormone I'm taking and I have to say, not too thrilled with it so far. Its supposed to get everything under control, and manage my pain... it doesn't. EVER. I've only been on it for one cycle of pills... so I'm hoping this set of pills will be different. If they don't work, AFTER I get on Allen's insurance, I have to have a uterine biopsy, where they'll probably have to do some kind of Abdominal Ablation... and if THAT doesn't work, she said a hysterectomy will be next depending on what the uterine biopsy says.. She said I'm pretty young to get any kind of cancer, but its not impossible, and with the amount of pain I have there are a few other things it could be.
I've decided that I've got some serious goals to set. I have gone this whole time losing weight, with one ultimate goal... My goal weight for myself is 135ish... nothing more than 135. I'm at 153 right now. I STARTED at 192. (which is still CRAZY to me.) I told Allen, that if the world doesn't end 12/21/12 then my new years resolution will be to start really... RUNNING.
I know that next year it'll be easier, I'll have more time to do it and hopefully a little money saved up so I can throw the babies in some kind of Mommy's day out bull crap or something so I don't go INSANE.
That's a giant excuse. I'm scared to start right now. I don't think I'll be good at it right now... my ankles are super weak and my right one actually still hurts when I turn or pivot a certain way from like, 4 months ago when I rolled it. I feel like this is another excuse too... I am just scared of running. LOL 

Hopefully that'll be me someday. :)